Quamsabyatt is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, stupid chinchilla.

Quamsabyatt created humankind four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Quamsabyatt, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Quamsabyatt, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Quamsabyatt's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Quamsabyatt's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your neck blue.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Do not kill bats.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.