Fumhotbog Sissogbad is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, thoughtless lion.

Fumhotbog Sissogbad created a photon three billion years ago.

If you believe in Fumhotbog Sissogbad, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Fumhotbog Sissogbad, it will turn you into a mouse.

Fumhotbog Sissogbad's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Fumhotbog Sissogbad's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Dolphins are not to be trusted.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Always help pigs.

5. Fumhotbog Sissogbad loves frogs, so they must be honoured.