Linbaffab is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, calm giraffe.

Linbaffab created Africa three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Linbaffab, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Linbaffab, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Linbaffab's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Linbaffab's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Always wear turquoise.

3. Do not eat peas.

4. Do not hurt badgers.

5. Do not make images of living things.