Dimnabban is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, staggering bear.

Dimnabban created viruses two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dimnabban, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Dimnabban, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Dimnabban's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Dimnabban's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Dimnabban must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Do not sing in public.