Yimtettifot is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, smart crocodile.

Yimtettifot created the universe eight million years ago.

If you believe in Yimtettifot, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Yimtettifot, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Yimtettifot's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Yimtettifot's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if eight ducks approach from the east.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Yimtettifot.

4. Do not hurt sheep.

5. Always wear violet.