Beplak is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, compassionate human.

Beplak created humankind nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Beplak, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Beplak, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Beplak's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Beplak's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the east.

2. Always look after injured ducks.

3. Never think ill of sick snails.

4. Never look at galaxies.

5. Beplak must be the most important thing in your life.