Targxemgut is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, all-knowing human.

Targxemgut created the Black Eye Galaxy nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Targxemgut, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Targxemgut, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Targxemgut's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Targxemgut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair pink.

2. Worship no other gods but Targxemgut.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate aardvarks.

4. Do not run in public.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.