Barnjengan is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, omnipotent octopus.

Barnjengan created time and space three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Barnjengan, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Barnjengan, she will attempt to scare you with floods.

Barnjengan's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Barnjengan's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no bats in a building before entering it.

2. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Barnjengan on top of all buildings.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Barnjengan.