Zanfitbess is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, stupid dog.

Zanfitbess created a down quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zanfitbess, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Zanfitbess, it will destroy your home galaxy.

Zanfitbess' most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Zanfitbess' Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Always help sick tapirs.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Zanfitbess loves horses, so they must be honoured.