Bimnurl is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, unsympathetic tortoise.

Bimnurl created an electron five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bimnurl, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Bimnurl, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Bimnurl's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Bimnurl's Holy Commandments

1. Rats are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Do not dye your hair yellow.

3. Retreat if five cats approach from the east.

4. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.