Listxemfob is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, pitiless octopus.

Listxemfob created the planet Saturn two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Listxemfob, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Listxemfob, he will laugh at you.

Listxemfob's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Listxemfob's Holy Commandments

1. Put Listxemfob first in all things.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Do not kill sharks.

5. Run away from black dolphins, for they are unholy.