Danpanomt is a god.

He takes the form of a small, competent donkey.

Danpanomt created a strange quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Danpanomt, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Danpanomt, he will try to impress you with trees.

Danpanomt's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Danpanomt's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Do not kill manatees.

3. Always help shrews.

4. Erect a large iron sculpture of Danpanomt on top of all buildings.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Danpanomt.