Tarplikgud is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, irritating chinchilla.

Tarplikgud created an atom three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tarplikgud, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Tarplikgud, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Tarplikgud's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Tarplikgud's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Tarplikgud.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Do not kill whales.

5. Never talk about comets.