Yarzigtap is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, unthoughtful donkey.

Yarzigtap created the Cigar Galaxy three million years ago.

If you believe in Yarzigtap, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Yarzigtap, she will destroy your home solar system.

Yarzigtap's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Yarzigtap's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Do not wear nickel on your body.

4. Always make sure there are no monkeys in a building before entering it.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.