Nilwapmob is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, loving badger.

Nilwapmob created the Tadpole Galaxy four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nilwapmob, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Nilwapmob, she will remove you from existence.

Nilwapmob's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Nilwapmob's Holy Commandments

1. Nilwapmob loves nematodes, so they must be honoured.

2. Always look after injured squirrels.

3. Feed all hungry manatees.

4. Never feed apples to geese while wearing magenta corsets.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Nilwapmob.