Hakgodvad is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, duplicitous crow.

Hakgodvad created an atom six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hakgodvad, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Hakgodvad, he will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Hakgodvad's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Hakgodvad's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Hakgodvad five times a day.

2. Never think about moons.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.