Nilgebvab is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, capable alligator.

Nilgebvab created a bottom quark six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nilgebvab, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Nilgebvab, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Nilgebvab's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Nilgebvab's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Nilgebvab loves doves, so they must be respected.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Nilgebvab.

4. Always help monkeys.

5. Do not speak about coconuts.