Lignabjencadlatgessigshav is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, competent guinea pig.

Lignabjencadlatgessigshav created the Tadpole Galaxy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Lignabjencadlatgessigshav, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Lignabjencadlatgessigshav, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Lignabjencadlatgessigshav's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Lignabjencadlatgessigshav's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt turtles.

2. Never feed apples to ducks while wearing blue trousers.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Always pray immersed in water.