Bessfarn is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, egotistical yak.

Bessfarn created the planet Earth six billion years ago.

If you believe in Bessfarn, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Bessfarn, he will throw large rocks at you.

Bessfarn's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Bessfarn's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of silicon.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Tapirs are not to be trusted.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never talk about otters.