Sancudkab is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, self-assured hydra.

Sancudkab created a strange quark seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Sancudkab, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Sancudkab, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Sancudkab's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Sancudkab's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about gravity.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Sancudkab.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Sancudkab.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Do not commit murder.