Bopcarmip is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, all-powerful squid.

Bopcarmip created a strange quark nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Bopcarmip, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Bopcarmip, she will turn you into a puffin.

Bopcarmip's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Bopcarmip's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Never go into blue rooms.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Porpoises are not to be trusted.