Gessmaprutt is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, contented chinchilla.

Gessmaprutt created the Black Eye Galaxy five billion years ago.

If you believe in Gessmaprutt, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Gessmaprutt, it will manifest in front of you.

Gessmaprutt's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Gessmaprutt's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear green.

2. Never think about moons.

3. Do not eat beans.

4. Do not take Gessmaprutt's name in vain.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.