Gunpogfod is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, wise owl.

Gunpogfod created snails nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Gunpogfod, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Gunpogfod, it will ignore you and hope you go away.

Gunpogfod's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Gunpogfod's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at nebulae.

2. Put Gunpogfod first in all things.

3. Do not wear turquoise clothing.

4. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

5. Respect your elders.