Fotfarnzig Watpogkon is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, confident dragon.

Fotfarnzig Watpogkon created an up quark two years ago.

If you believe in Fotfarnzig Watpogkon, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Fotfarnzig Watpogkon, it will curse you with boils.

Fotfarnzig Watpogkon's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Fotfarnzig Watpogkon's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear brown.

2. Do not sit in public.

3. Do not kill dolphins.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Put Fotfarnzig Watpogkon first in all things.