Dissnuryam is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, unselfish tortoise.

Dissnuryam created the Sol system five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dissnuryam, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Dissnuryam, it will cry a lot.

Dissnuryam's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Dissnuryam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat peanuts.

2. Never paint your head cyan.

3. Do not shave your hands.

4. Fast once a month.

5. You must pray to Dissnuryam eight times a day.