Armpagarp is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, able camel.

Armpagarp created light five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Armpagarp, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Armpagarp, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Armpagarp's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Armpagarp's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear blue.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Armpagarp must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.