Stafflaprak is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, blissful dingo.

Stafflaprak created the Small Magellanic Cloud six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Stafflaprak, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Stafflaprak, it will be very sad.

Stafflaprak's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Stafflaprak's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Stafflaprak on top of all buildings.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Never hurt grasshopers.

4. Never write about comets.

5. Never pour water over plants.