Hadlamhap is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, slow deer.

Hadlamhap created a Higgs boson seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hadlamhap, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Hadlamhap, she will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Hadlamhap's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Hadlamhap's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about nebulae.

2. Always wear cyan.

3. Feed all hungry horses.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Hadlamhap.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.