Lattofbadfarn is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, quiet wombat.

Lattofbadfarn created light eight million years ago.

If you believe in Lattofbadfarn, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Lattofbadfarn, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Lattofbadfarn's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Lattofbadfarn's Holy Commandments

1. Voles are not to be trusted.

2. Lattofbadfarn must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Do not dye your hair red.

5. Never talk about hamsters.