Dissjinlun is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, grumpy jaguar.

Dissjinlun created light nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Dissjinlun, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Dissjinlun, she will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Dissjinlun's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Dissjinlun's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Do not kill eagles.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. You must never eat grapes.

5. Retreat if nine mites approach from the south.