Yakfitnel is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, smart fish.

Yakfitnel created Africa five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yakfitnel, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Yakfitnel, it will send you a sign.

Yakfitnel's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Yakfitnel's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

2. You must never eat cherries.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Never wear shoes.

5. Always help sheep in need.