Xemgofdub is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, self-assured troll.

Xemgofdub created everything that exists seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Xemgofdub, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Xemgofdub, he will torture you forever.

Xemgofdub's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Xemgofdub's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Xemgofdub.

5. Fast once a month.