Himspagrutt is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, unfair narwhal.

Himspagrutt created the Sol system six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Himspagrutt, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Himspagrutt, it will turn you into a puffin.

Himspagrutt's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Himspagrutt's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your face.

2. You must love Himspagrutt.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Never bounce in holy places.

5. Always wear fawn.