Nellgemcid is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, all-powerful bird.

Nellgemcid created a top quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Nellgemcid, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Nellgemcid, it will turn you into a rat.

Nellgemcid's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Nellgemcid's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Nellgemcid on top of all buildings.

5. Nellgemcid loves manatees, so they must be respected.