Hakontfub is a god.

It takes the form of a small, self-assured dolphin.

Hakontfub created a charm quark four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hakontfub, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Hakontfub, it will not care at all.

Hakontfub's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Hakontfub's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Hakontfub.

2. Feed all hungry manatees.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate sheep.