Damlidlig is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, fast hedgehog.

Damlidlig created an up quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Damlidlig, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Damlidlig, she will turn you into a rock.

Damlidlig's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Damlidlig's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about asteroids.

2. Never paint your feet violet.

3. Never wear yellow coats.

4. Never hurt turtles.

5. Never talk about cell theory.