Dunvonkton is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, resourceful scorpion.

Dunvonkton created a bottom quark three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dunvonkton, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Dunvonkton, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Dunvonkton's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Dunvonkton's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Dunvonkton.