Tamnurtcan is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, resourceful rhinoceros.

Tamnurtcan created the solar system two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tamnurtcan, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Tamnurtcan, it will throw large rocks at you.

Tamnurtcan's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Tamnurtcan's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Tamnurtcan loves capybaras, so they must be respected.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Tamnurtcan.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Do not hurt great tits.