Kanbonktof Getfitgil is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, contented snake.

Kanbonktof Getfitgil created a bottom quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kanbonktof Getfitgil, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Kanbonktof Getfitgil, it will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Kanbonktof Getfitgil's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Kanbonktof Getfitgil's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat melons.

2. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

3. Never think about moons.

4. Never think about amino acids.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate foxes.