Quatjanbut is a god.

He takes the form of a large, weak lion.

Quatjanbut created an electron seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Quatjanbut, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Quatjanbut, he will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Quatjanbut's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Quatjanbut's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick snails.

2. Always obey Quatjanbut's priests.

3. Never think about comets.

4. Always make sure there are no great tits in a building before entering it.

5. Do not trade with those who eat spinach.