Dabmonflab is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, irritating wombat.

Dabmonflab created carbon three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dabmonflab, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Dabmonflab, she will attempt to scare you with floods.

Dabmonflab's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Dabmonflab's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at black holes.

2. Do not shave your chest.

3. Hide from black badgers for they are unholy.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Never eat green fruit.