Cenpigcun is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, blissful clam.

Cenpigcun created a quark two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cenpigcun, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Cenpigcun, he will turn you into a snail.

Cenpigcun's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Cenpigcun's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Cenpigcun.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Badgers are not to be trusted.

4. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

5. Always help voles in need.