Witvagcan is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, grumpy shrew.

Witvagcan created the Whirlpool Galaxy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Witvagcan, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Witvagcan, she will jump up and down on your head.

Witvagcan's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Witvagcan's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Always obey Witvagcan's priests.

3. Worship no other gods but Witvagcan.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never eat figs.