Hinstip is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, confident hippopotamus.

Hinstip created viruses two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hinstip, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Hinstip, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Hinstip's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Hinstip's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate great tits.

2. Do not wear tin on your body.

3. Never laugh in the presence of geese.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Do not chop down trees.