Kandobhab is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, slow mink.

Kandobhab created a photon two billion years ago.

If you believe in Kandobhab, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Kandobhab, it will ignore you and hope you go away.

Kandobhab's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Kandobhab's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat nuts.

2. Seals are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Do not speak about figs.