Timnellcum is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, happy raccoon.

Timnellcum created snails seven million years ago.

If you believe in Timnellcum, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Timnellcum, she will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Timnellcum's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Timnellcum's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Timnellcum.

2. Pray towards the east.

3. Never laugh near cats.

4. Never talk about amino acids.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate otters.