Yakgodtonk is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, omnipotent hamster.

Yakgodtonk created matter two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yakgodtonk, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Yakgodtonk, he will destroy your home planet.

Yakgodtonk's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Yakgodtonk's Holy Commandments

1. Always help tortoises in need.

2. Do not shave your face.

3. Never talk about comets.

4. Never write about black holes.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.