Pig is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, dishonest wombat.

Pig created carbon two million years ago.

If you believe in Pig, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Pig, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Pig's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Pig's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

3. Never think about gravity.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Hide if five cats approach from the south.