Caphinfar is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, kind eagle.

Caphinfar created the Virgo Supercluster five billion years ago.

If you believe in Caphinfar, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Caphinfar, he will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Caphinfar's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Caphinfar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Never talk about cell theory.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Caphinfar.

5. Always take life seriously.