Wotwabwittip is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, thoughtless wolf.

Wotwabwittip created Europe three million years ago.

If you believe in Wotwabwittip, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Wotwabwittip, it will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Wotwabwittip's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Wotwabwittip's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat pigs with great respect.

2. Always wear purple.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Wotwabwittip.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate sheep.